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Story of a Four year old Bride

Posted 25 July 2007 - 01:39 AM (#1) User is offline   Secular-Revolution 

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Brutal torture of Afghan girl sold as bride aged 4

The suffering of Gulsoma's first 12 years is not immediately apparent in the little girl with an open face, who is doted on at Kabul's Women's Affairs Ministry. But in repose her features cloud and she clasps her arms around herself, while the overlapping scars on her body offer a crude account of abuse.

She was married at the age of four into a family where she was treated as a slave, beaten with electric cables, stoned, her limbs broken with an axe handle, starved, burned and doused with boiling water. Once she was used as a human table top. She says her father-in-law tortured her further by literally rubbing salt into her wounds, an experience so painful she says she asked God to let her die.

Gulsoma, now 13, is one of the first young girls to be rescued by Afghanistan's Women's Affairs Ministry, which was established after the fall of the Taliban government as a first step to improving the lot of women in one of the world's most unequal societies.

But cruelty to children comes to light rarely. As well as her scars , Gulsoma walks with a limp, has limited use of one arm and has a large bald patch at the back of her head where boiling water has scarred her. But the culture that allowed her abuse is all too familiar in southern Afghanistan.

Gulsoma says that her earliest memory is being married to a neighbour's son at the age of four. The groom, Abdullah, was three.

"I remember the green clothes I wore," she says quietly, clinging to the waist of the Independent's photographer. "I don't remember if I was happy or not." Her father owned a small shop in a village near Kandahar, deep in the lawless, ultra-conservative Pashtun belt of southern Afghanistan where the Taliban insurgency persists.

The social code of Pashtunwali dominates in the region. It is a culture of loyalty to kin and courtesy to guests, but also a code where family matters are private and the threat of violence offsets the lack of central government control.

As chattels women can be bought and sold, are never seen outside the home without a burkha, rarely educated and prevented from contact with men beyond immediate family.

When Gulsoma's father was killed by a landmine her mother's prospects were bleak. Widows are rarely allowed to remarry outside their husband's family. Many end up on the street. Kabul is home to around 50,000 impoverished or destitute widows.

Gulsoma's mother was lucky to find a new husband, but the man didn't want a daughter. So at four years old she was sold in marriage for 3 million afghani to a neighbour, a school janitor called Juma Gul, to become the wife of the man's three-year-old son. Her value at that time was roughly £40.

Such child marriages remain a feature of Afghan customary practice, particularly in the south.

Within a year her mother had left for Pakistan and she was being used as a slave by her husband's family and forced to live and sleep on an old carpet in the yard. In the winter the desert air grew bitterly cold. Today Gulsoma says that she often finds herself shivering involuntarily when night falls.

"Once I fell asleep when I was washing clothes," she recalls. "They woke me by pouring boiling water over me from a tea urn." She was beaten for any perceived failure with sticks or electric flex. Her father-in-law encouraged his children to throw stones at her. The family stopped feeding her, except left-over scraps. When she was forced to lie down as an improvised table top she says her father used a knife to cut food on her back.

In 2000, she made an attempt to escape. But when she found her way to a Taliban checkpoint they beat her, telling her she had brought disgrace on her family, and returned her.

But last year, Gulsoma felt she no longer had a choice. A watch went missing and she was blamed.

"I swore on the Koran that I did not take it," she says. "But my father-in-law beat me the whole day with an axe handle. He told me if the watch was not returned he would kill me in the morning." Before dawn Gulsoma escaped the compound and hid under a rickshaw. When the driver took her to the police they were appalled by her condition and confronted her husband's family.

When neighbours confirmed the story the police beat Juma Gul savagely in front of Gulsoma.

"I cried when I saw that," she says, "because it reminded me of my own beatings." Juma Gul spent less than a year in prison. Gulsoma was transferred first to an orphanage in Kandahar and then to Kabul.

She has begun school for the first time, where her teachers describe her as a highly intelligent student. She lives in an orphanage where she has many friends.

However, her father-in-law still owns her and is looking for her. Under Pashtunwali women have no right of divorce. If she were to marry another man her father-in-law's family would be honour-bound to kill both. Her chances of employment are slim.



Kaabay Kis Mun Se Jao Ge SR!
Sharam Tum Ko Magar Nahin Aati

The difference between the Mullah and Satan is that the latter is not a hypocrite!
[Secular Revolution - the artist formerly known as Sunni Revolution]
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Posted 25 July 2007 - 11:47 AM (#2) User is offline   Hamzah 

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Intresting article here
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Posted 25 July 2007 - 06:17 PM (#3) User is offline   INTOXICATION-BURN 

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Thank you brother SR  that is some eye opener for the one's that live in the West and enjoying them self's in there recently built conservatory and having a cup of tea............. "Jolly good weather is not old chap! It's a bit miserable!"

There is a big difference in the way societies think and behave some my say backward thinking people and some may say uncivilized.

So what can one do to change there ways or thinking just leave them to there own business. As long as we are not following there customs and abuse we could not give a toss!

One also need's to see and understand what time and age one is living in there is a big difference in mentality in the West and East, "this is the way our Great Grand parents did it? So it is right! ............. ****off.....................who are you to tell us it's wrong!"

I know what we may say is wrong is quite normal to some? (just a shame)

Also try to understand Islam come to reason and don't beat IT!

 

(I hope that was a bit constructive bro Hamza...lol)


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Posted 25 July 2007 - 08:26 PM (#4) User is offline   miss17 

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shame...thats heartbreaking...that poor child...may Allah make it easy for her ameen
YA ALLAH,YA MUSTAFA (SAW),YA GHAUS ALMADAT
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Posted 26 July 2007 - 03:47 AM (#5) User is online   Qadri-Jilani 

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Well the first thing that needs to be tackled is that it is completely impermissible to sell off your daughter. People know this, but still do so despite knowing so. think it's the money factor that causes it coupled with a lack of morals and Islamic teachings.
Maslak-e-Ahl-e-Sunnat

jarahat al-sinani laha'l-tiyamu ma yaltamu jarahat al-lisani
ei biradar chu 'aqibat khakast, khaak shawesh az ankei khaak shawee
apni millat par qiyas aqwam-e-maghrib sei na kar, khas hei tarkeeb mein qawm-e-Rasool-e-Hashmi
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Posted 26 July 2007 - 10:28 AM (#6) User is offline   Tahir-Riaz 

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Originally posted by: Qadri Jilani

Well the first thing that needs to be tackled is that it is completely impermissible to sell off your daughter. People know this, but still do so despite knowing so. think it's the money factor that causes it coupled with a lack of morals and Islamic teachings.

With all due respect just tell me one thing. Does the Maulvi who recite the Nikaq in such marriages, even for a second, entertain the possibility that the father might be selling their kid?

It's not about corrupt people but Islam providing such individuals a framework to legalize their illegal action in the eyes of the society.


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Posted 26 July 2007 - 01:33 PM (#7) User is online   Qadri-Jilani 

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good point, think the person reading nikah should investigate especially if it is a common problem in his area. quite sad, such moulvis may even be aware and part of the same problem (whether they know the law or not). Cannot say for sure but things need to be in place to prevent this.
Maslak-e-Ahl-e-Sunnat

jarahat al-sinani laha'l-tiyamu ma yaltamu jarahat al-lisani
ei biradar chu 'aqibat khakast, khaak shawesh az ankei khaak shawee
apni millat par qiyas aqwam-e-maghrib sei na kar, khas hei tarkeeb mein qawm-e-Rasool-e-Hashmi
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Posted 26 July 2007 - 01:47 PM (#8) User is offline   NAQSHABANDI 

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tahir sahib, interesting comment!

The only people who are responsible are the individuals who are doing this

Islam is not providing the framework- so called 'muslims' are!!



SAB SE OLA O ALA HAMARA NABI

SAB SE BALA O ALA HAMARA NABI
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Posted 26 July 2007 - 02:51 PM (#9) User is offline   SlaveOfAllah 

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This is very depressing..I hope Allah(swt) gives Sabr to this young girl..May Allah(swt) make her life better.

What can cause a mother or a father to sell their children?
I believe the problems is education but even deeper than this is the issue relating to poverty.  Until these Countries develop some sort of welfare system this sort of thing will carry on.  If some of these Muslim Countries actually collected Zakat correclty and of course the average Joe public paying it, we would not have these kind of problems.  May Allah(swt) help us to follow and apply our deen to our full abilities.  
Praise be to Allah, the Lord of all the worlds, the All-Merciful, the Most Merciful, the King of the Day of Judgement. You alone we worship. You alone we ask for help. Guide us on the Straight Path, the Path of those You have blessed, not of those with anger on them, nor of the misguided.


(Qur'an, 1:1-7)
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Posted 26 July 2007 - 03:17 PM (#10) User is online   Qadri-Jilani 

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Something important that slipped my mind. The issue of selling daughters is widespread in patan areas. Such areas are quite well known for selling off their daughters and it's happening as we speak.  So the whole society is like that there and it will not be easy to sort out these massive areas where it is an endemic problem, a lot of effort is needed and will take a lot of time. Not sure how it can possibly be tackled.

Allah help us.
Maslak-e-Ahl-e-Sunnat

jarahat al-sinani laha'l-tiyamu ma yaltamu jarahat al-lisani
ei biradar chu 'aqibat khakast, khaak shawesh az ankei khaak shawee
apni millat par qiyas aqwam-e-maghrib sei na kar, khas hei tarkeeb mein qawm-e-Rasool-e-Hashmi
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Posted 26 July 2007 - 04:04 PM (#11) User is offline   Secular-Revolution 

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Originally posted by: Qadri Jilani
Well the first thing that needs to be tackled is that it is completely impermissible to sell off your daughter.

Can you please narrate a verse from the Holy Quran or Hadith to this effect that explicitly states it is not permissible to sell one's daughter.

You see it is important we make that clear or otherwise some pea-brain individuals may claim that you are making up a law that is not explicitly outlawed by Allah Taalah.

Also, please advise what constitutes as a sale of a daughter? Is it cash payment or benefit in kind? How can an under handed transaction be proven? It could legitimately be referred to as the "marriage".



Kaabay Kis Mun Se Jao Ge SR!
Sharam Tum Ko Magar Nahin Aati

The difference between the Mullah and Satan is that the latter is not a hypocrite!
[Secular Revolution - the artist formerly known as Sunni Revolution]
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Posted 26 July 2007 - 04:46 PM (#12) User is online   Qadri-Jilani 

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well it is agreed upon by all that you can only sell a slave, and as the daughter is not a slave but a freed woman she cannot be sold as she is not the property (milkeeyat) of anyone. I will look for references later (time permitting); i just stated what i studied in fiqh and do not think it's an issue of difference. It can be established in the same way anything is sold, same terms apply.
Maslak-e-Ahl-e-Sunnat

jarahat al-sinani laha'l-tiyamu ma yaltamu jarahat al-lisani
ei biradar chu 'aqibat khakast, khaak shawesh az ankei khaak shawee
apni millat par qiyas aqwam-e-maghrib sei na kar, khas hei tarkeeb mein qawm-e-Rasool-e-Hashmi
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Posted 26 July 2007 - 06:53 PM (#13) User is online   Qadri-Jilani 

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Children for sale will be on bbc tonight:

BBC exposes Bulgarian baby trade
Harry, the baby smuggler in Varna Harry said he was an experienced people-smuggler
Babies are being illegally offered for sale in Bulgaria with the promise of smuggling them abroad, an undercover BBC News team has discovered.


http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/6917308.stm

Maslak-e-Ahl-e-Sunnat

jarahat al-sinani laha'l-tiyamu ma yaltamu jarahat al-lisani
ei biradar chu 'aqibat khakast, khaak shawesh az ankei khaak shawee
apni millat par qiyas aqwam-e-maghrib sei na kar, khas hei tarkeeb mein qawm-e-Rasool-e-Hashmi
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Posted 26 July 2007 - 11:06 PM (#14) User is offline   Secular-Revolution 

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Originally posted by: Qadri Jilani
and do not think it's an issue of difference.

It is not an issue of difference but if we apply the same argument as some individuals were using in arguing against establishment of a minimum age for marriage in a separate thread then it becomes relevant.

I'll await your research on the matter.



Kaabay Kis Mun Se Jao Ge SR!
Sharam Tum Ko Magar Nahin Aati

The difference between the Mullah and Satan is that the latter is not a hypocrite!
[Secular Revolution - the artist formerly known as Sunni Revolution]
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Posted 27 July 2007 - 07:57 AM (#15) User is offline   QadriAttari786 

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There must be a special place in the hellfire reserved for people who abuse and victimize other humans and for those people who abuse and victimize animals or any other living thing.

There is no place for such brutality in Islam.

People who do the sorts of things described above should be deeply ashamed to even call themselves Muslims and they should fear Allah azzawajjal.
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Posted 27 July 2007 - 05:37 PM (#16) User is offline   k847guns 

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stuff like this happens in india too in all communities and south amercia. but when something happens in a muslim country the western media na dpeople from the east quickly attack innocent muslims. these are the main problems tat need to be solved but tough **** PEOPLE WHO HAVE THE MONEY AND POWER ARE NOT.
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Posted 27 July 2007 - 11:27 PM (#17) User is offline   QadriAttari786 

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It is true that when such heinous crimes occur in Muslim populated areas, they are advertised much more by the media than if they occur in non-Muslims areas.

However, this does not absolve Muslims from the responsibility to work towards educating people in Muslim countries to prevent crimes like what has been done to this poor 4 year old girl.

Reading the story about the 4 yr old girl should move everyone's heart and cause sadness to well up in the heart. If it does not, then it means that one's heart is too hard and one does not have sufficient empathy for others.

As Muslims we have a greater responsibility than any other group to adhere to the values of tolerance, compassion, and service to humanity because that is the example of the Sweet Madani Prophet sallalaho alayhi wa aalihi wassalam.

May Allah azzawajjal have mercy on all of us, especially the little children regardless of religion, and give us all the proper guidance to fear Allah azzawajjal and not victimize or brutalize other human beings, physically or psychologically. Aameen.
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Posted 28 July 2007 - 02:26 PM (#18) User is offline   Rafeel 

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Harsher punishment proposed to discourage Vani, Swara

They have heard our cry, have a read.
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Posted 29 July 2007 - 12:02 AM (#19) User is offline   anisahnosheen 

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astagfirula what kind of heart those people have.
this makes you cry once u read the first word of her journey!!!


anisah nosheen
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Posted 18 August 2007 - 09:53 PM (#20) User is offline   k847guns 

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basterdddddddddss
kill themmmmmm


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