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One of my colleague is in need of ur advice.She is a hindu girl and these days she is really impetience and emotional...Nothing can describe her torments that she going thru...i will try make it short... 

Her first husband died and recently she been seperated from her second husband and now she lives at her mom's house. She doesnt want to marry again but want to live with her second husband.Actually her husband is worst than an animal , He becomes an insaan in the day time and haywaan at night, he beat her up and his kids also, who is just few months baby.He drink alcohol on a regular basis, and made her life hell.

She filed a case in court and its taking too much time,Her husband wants her to come back but she says if her husband admits in the court that he had beaten her and her kids then she would go back to her husband's house but he is not saying so, of course no one will admit it in the court , and she is doing so coz once he admit it then she would have been given security from the court and next time if he beats her then she would legally be stronger and action would be taken againt him.

one thing is clear that he would never ever his faults in the court and therefore another measure should be taken but not thru the court but b/w the elders, and what should be that????

plzz guys advice something so i can forward it to her...

hope to hear soon  

Jazakallah khairan

Proud Indian from Leeds - no more questions please!

how long she would have petience, she is in 30s, and what will she do in her whole life???  Thats what bothers me :(

salams,

by the looks of things she still wants him and he still wants her which is a good start!!  i think the problem is with his excessive drinking you say he is all bani adam during the day but becomes a hawanni insan during the nights. 

the question is why is he drinking so much?  what are the reasons for his exsessive drinking? he clearly needs help,  both of them need to sit down and talk about this. the reason people drink majority of the time is cos of boredom or pressures at work/ social standing i.e respect in the community (maybe people think of him as an outcast) so to get out of this he drinks in excess, then goes home and takes his frustrations out on his wife, unfortunately. 

maybe moving out of the area they are living in at the moment could help, what do you think?  your freind (his wife) making a little effort by make some nights special so he does not go out?  instead of him going to shops to buy alcohol on his own ask your freind to go with him and gradually asks him instead of buying drinks he spends a lttle of that money on his children,  by doing this (InshALLAH) he might start controlling his excess drinking.

remember your freind will need patience and a freind, so be there for her for her to help her husband InshALLAH.  the problem is his excessive drinking,  she will need to practice patience on him and InshALLAH they will prosper.  females are a lot stronger than males, when they put their heart to something - most times they do succseed. 

 i hope things work out for them, InshALLAH.  all the best.

i think it must work as zahir said that they should spend some time together and discuss where the problem is then it may work... I told her to talk with him if he rings you and try to sort out the things themselves rather than thru courts. 

But should she call him first or wait for his call ???

now the situation is bit changed, this friend of mine gave her child in his father's custody and cannot live without her child.

she cry everytime, could not sleep whole night and come to work in the morning..

now she says that you say five time salah so you pray for me and asking for some dua to get her son back. and she said if its in arabic then u read it . is it allowed that i read on her behalf? or any dua that she herself can read like any name of Allah ?

i also heard that dua should not be given to any non muslim. only a naksha can be given, is that right?

I am at a loss why she gave the CHILD to him?? Why would someone do that knowing he could harm the baby.

You should advise her to leave him, and get her child back off him. She has a strong case with him being an alcoholic and abusive.

I do feel really sorry for her as she had had no luck in relationships. This is the time where if you support her and be there for her maybe you can guide her to the true way of Islam. I feel it is your duty as a fellow human being to support anyone in distress.

May Allah have mercy on her.

I will keep it short, she seriously needs to consider getting out of this marriage asap and get the custody of her child back. A religion isn't something which offers miracles 24/7 but practical measures to our lives. As of yet, all this occurings is affecting her emotionally and would menally distress her furher if she doesn't back off for a better life in future. May Allah guide her to the religion and give her protection. She should realize that women isn't someone to abuse around at the hands of filthy animals but is equally empowered to live with dignity and self-respect.

I will recommend you to bring her to this family, inshAllah we all would help her in any way possible.

she already appealed in the court fo rtaking her child back but it will take sometime like 2-3 months.

yes sister im there with her for support and she comes to me when im at work and i give her time to talk with me and never feel alone...she doesnt share such things with anyone in the office except me and therefore i do whatever i can, she trust me , do what i say.

i usually talk with her about islam and she likes it very much and listen carefully and understand. just today i was talking about the things which is forbidden in islam and why it is forbidden, she was agreed with that and i think she would follow what i said to her